Yimin: Hi everyone and welcome back to Asian Youth! Today’s blog is based on a conversation between me and Yuriko. Yuriko is a 23-year-old writer based in Sakai, Japan. She has the brightest smile I have ever seen. She is always present, making me feel like life is worth living. She is also a social magnet, attracting many like-minded youth entrepreneurs collaborating with her. In the interview, Yuriko shared many inspiring experiences and ideas about failure, progress and mindfulness. It motivated me as a growing youth and change maker. After you read the interview, I believe that you will find out the reason.
Yuriko: Hi everyone, I'm Yuriko, a Japanese woman based in Osaka. I just graduated from university and I am taking a gap year now. When I was 20, I went to folk high school in Denmark. And I got a lot of tips for living sustainably(And met my dear friend Yimin!). After coming back to Japan, I joined the project to make folk high school in Japan. And now, I'm looking for "inner sustainability" with working and writing.
Our conversation started with my curiosity for the project Yuriko is taking part of: 失敗談(GARAKUTA-KARA) - failure story collection. In their official website, they introduced themselves as: “a fictitious museum that exhibits the "failures" of entrepreneurs.”
(1. picture from 失敗談 official website)
“So my project leader wanted to start up something in her life, but she was scared of failing already from the beginning. In Japan, failing is considered to be extremely shameful.” Yuri said, “But with that fear, she realised many startups and experienced entrepreneurs have failed. We just never know about the failure stories. We are exposed to and obsessed with the success stories.”
For me, it is hilarious that the fear of failure made her friend start a project about failure.
“It is so interesting. Often when I fail I feel alone. I think a lot of people feel this way. When I think about it, the reason is that I am never exposed to these failure stories. So I took success as the norm.” I told Yuriko.
“Exactly. We were actually inspired by the museum of failure. We found their exhibition online. It was a shock for me that I had a stigmatised idea of failure which I never realised.”
Yuri further introduced the museum of failure:” It is a museum created by psychologist Dr. Samuel West. He found out that 80% of innovations are failures. Companies often hide them under the carpet. In the museum, you can see so many failed products like google glasses with extremely concerning privacy designs or amazon cell phone with a “buy” button on it. People hated the products, but the companies learnt from making them and failing.”
(2. failed product of beef lasagne from Colgate displayed in museum of failure)
“I think the most important thing Dr. Samuel did was to destigmatize failures. That is also exactly what we are trying to do in GARAKUTA-KARA. The difference is that we focus on entrepreneurs and Dr. Samuel focuses on products.” Yuri analyses.
“So what is failure for you? What does it mean to fail in your context?” I asked.
“ It is a good question. We are still looking for a definition for failure. In my opinion, failure is something we feel shameful about. Failure is just a negative feeling.”
This definition aroused my curiosity: “If you could eliminate the feeling of shame, would you say that there is no failure even if the result is not the desired outcome?”
“Yes, I would say so.”
Yuriko gave me an example. A man closed a company after running it for three years. In Japan, it will be considered a shameful failure. However, for Yuriko, the man had learned a lot of experiences and ideas through this process. According to Yuriko’s definition of failure: If he does not think he failed, then nobody could say he failed.
The empowerment in Yuri’s story comes from the acceptance towards that 90% of failing chance. It is challenging for many to think of failure as a pure mental state rather than an objective fact.
Taking one more step forward, Yuriko thinks that it is important that we talk about our stories not only through GARAKUTA-KARA, but also in our daily conversations.
“When we have discourse. We can discuss, we can listen. We forgive ourselves, learn and step forward.”
She shared with me a personal story in which she failed, shared and went forward.
“When I was 20, it was difficult for me to reject other people. I felt that if I reject a project, I will deny my capacity in this area, so I cannot make the decision to reject. I also felt like the worst person when I say “no” to others. Fundamentally, I think it is because I was not able to believe in myself.”
“I am sorry to hear that. I hope you did not just come to our interview today because you could not reject me.”
“No, now I can say no. I’m getting the power to believe in myself and truly love myself.”
Yuriko told me the full story:
“When I was 20, I was studying in Doshisha University. Because I was not able to say no, I joined 10 different projects when my friends invited me. My university is quite far away from where I live. It takes 2 hours to go back and forth. It was difficult for me both mentally and physically.”
Yuriko’s story took a dramatic turn, “In this time, I burnt out. Actually, I lost my memory of the coming 6 months. I know what I did, because the photos are still there. However, I cannot remember the fact that I did them or how I thought about them back then.”
“After that period of time, I decided to take a gap year and go to a folk highschool in Denmark.” Yuri went on.
“Is that the period when you started to change?”
“Yes. I had so much free time when I started there, and so did a lot of other people in that school. So we talked a lot, like a lot, a lot, a lot. We shared so much about ourselves: how we live in Japan, what we think about certain things…… In Japan, there are very few opportunities to talk about the self. It was a fresh experience for me. Through talking about myself, I finally understood my own strength and weakness. It made me able to see myself objectively with love and respect.”
Yuri told me why one of our common teachers for personal leadership, Mette in school made her stay after class one day. Mette told Yuriko: “Yuri, believe in me. Weakness is your gift. Weakness is what connects you with other people. You should never feel ashamed of your weakness.”
Yuri took Mette’s words back with her to Japan with shock and disbelief. But she started to experiment. “I started to talk about myself, first to my family and then to my friends. I thought they would not be interested but all of them listened and told me things about them I did not know. Now I can believe what Mette told me. I also believe in myself.”
Yuriko is facing a transition period in her life now together with many other graduates in Japan. She reflects about her experience in relation to the country and the common fate of Japanese youth. “Japan is a very rich country, we have the opportunities to make good choices in life. Before that happens, we need to know ourselves who we are and how to make choices with knowledge and belief for ourselves.”
Cultural exchange should always be mutually beneficial. No matter where she goes, Yuri also always tries to share the mindset ofご縁 Goen and 一期一会 Ichi-go Ichi-e from Japanese culture. For her, these are important life principles.
“Goen is a mindset that considers the worth of every moment. One moment of meeting the people, meeting the new world is so worthwhile. It is the only time in my life (for that event). I think we have to take care of that moment.”
“When you go to a tea ceremony room, a calligraphy writing is sometimes shown–一期一会（Ichi-go Ichi-e ）It has similar value as Goen that every moment is only that each moment. I think it is kind of a miracle that every moment exists. We need to take care of it.”
A week ago, Yuriko graduated from Doshisha university. On facebook, she wrote about her future plan to take a gap year and “to look for who I am and how to “be the change”. For me, Yuri is already making changes in my life, I believe also in the lives of people around her.
I am deeply charmed by the entire conversation with Yuriko. I really believe that there are so much to learn about being present, accepting failures as growth, open communication and enjoyment of each moment. It is indeed a true miracle that I met with Yuriko, had this conversation and was able to share with all of you through the writing. I hope you could feel my deep appreciation through these words.
Here is the link to 失败谈(GARAKUTA-KARA) - failure story collection
https://sites.google.com/view/garakutakara?utm_source=internal&utm_medium=internal&utm_campaign=internal_after_release_event&fbclid=IwAR34SyTQJWtCsvaHgJEHspNpqQdMBZvzDIW-jJ2eVoYScHyZx6st_gIpsRQ
It is also interesting to watch the museum of failure.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoBsPRrTG7M&ab_channel=PBSNewsHour
If you are touched or just want to share the voice, you are welcome to share your failure story or appreciation in the comment! Thank you for reading.
一期一会~